prayformefather | four // video

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four // video

[Filtered away from ~~Admiral~~ Kirk]

[Hi, Barge. The younger, darker haired Kirkfais on board is not pleased with Jim's shenanigans, and is not bothering to hide this fact in the slightest. HE ALREADY HATED YOU ON PRINCIPLE FOR HAVING HIS FACE, AND NOW YOU DO THIS.

... Actually really he just kind of wants to make Jim's life miserable and doesn't care particularly about the take over itself. Luther is a little shit. :c]

So is anyone actually going to do something about this, or are we just going to sit around letting him get away with whatever he wants? I thought wardens were supposed to be, you know, people who wouldn't do this kind of thing?

And this is the second time he's done it? Why is he still a warden?

Flat | Top-Level Comments Only

When I get pushed too far by Wardens' bullshit, this is what happens.

I wasn't aware we were spreading around more than our usual share.

I know about Xavier, okay?

Oh, and my life has been falling apart lately, and my Warden ignored it even after I told her point blank that I wasn't all right.

This shit with Kirk is the last straw.

What about Xavier? I barely speak to the man. I certainly haven't been keeping his secrets.

Seems to me, Wanda, that you think we're playing poker, but you're the only one who can see the cards.

His big campaign to get his best friend's powers reinstated, and screw the rest of us, even his fellow mutants? That one.

Do you feel Mr. Lensherr is a threat to you with his powers? [It's a serious question -- it is, in fact, exactly what she was afraid of when she reluctantly supported Xavier.]

It's not that. It's a matter of fairness. I have suffered without my powers for a long time. I have been hurt multiple times because I couldn't defend myself properly. If I have to go through that horrible experience, and I'm ten times more benevolent than Magneto, why does he get a pass?

[She blinks, frowns.] I'm sorry, Wanda, but we do these things on a case-by-case basis, and I can't question the decisions of wardens who aren't here to ask. Mr. Xavier made an argument for his friend and I bought it, not out of any love for either man, but because it sounded to me like the safest crack at keeping future violence out of the picture.

If it helps, I still haven't given my inmate back her powers, and I have no intention of doing so until I'm sure it's safe to. And I'm a great deal more begrudgingly invested in her progress than I am Mr. Lensherr's.

See? No conspiracy. No favoritism. No poker. We're all just a bunch of people, doing our best with one card each.

What about fairness? Or setting a good example for us?

"One inmate got" -- as some of you put it --"screwed, so now you all do?" That doesn't seem fair to me.

No. Every inmate gets screwed. Regardless of whether we are trustworthy, regardless of our moral state, we all get screwed equally when we come here. So why should Erik get a pass?

Inmates are allowed varying degrees of freedom, you realize. It's case-by-case. What about that girl-- Miss Gaunt, wasn't it? With the magic? What about the ones who are let onto the shooting range when others aren't? Or, gods, I know the pub has a list, and it's bigger than you and the little girl. I doubt Mr. Pinkman is welcome in there any time soon.

I heard Mr. Xavier's case and I thought it was a good one. There are people who disagree with me on that. There are people who disagreed with me about Mr. Dracula, too, and I have yet to regret supporting his freedom.

So basically you're saying that my pulling a brainless sonofabitch first Warden who left me vulnerable to being hurt multiple times and absolutely refused to give me my powers back was just the luck of the draw, and I should suck it up and never expect there to be any kind of standards.

Last we spoke, you told me he had good reasons for not letting you have them. I was impressed by you, then.

I was making excuses for him because I couldn't deal with the pain. The truth is that I have been scared every day. What the hell were you impressed by? My submissiveness to the Wardens? My blind trust in a man who never had my best interests in mind? I played along because I never had a choice. But I never liked it. I have been miserable for a long time. I've just learned to hide it well because the moment I don't some sonofabitch like Prefect pops up to shout me down.

This place has been a fucking nightmare for me. Don't think that because I'm well behaved that I'm not living in misery.

Really? All that? Because I saw a girl who understood her limitations and responsibilities in a way few young ladies do. I saw a girl who understood that most of the people here are doing the best they bloody well can with limited resources and a lot of difficulties. I saw a girl I would have offered a Watch job in a heartbeat, because that takes a lot of guts and a lot of brains, that kind of understanding about the world. That's command-level thinking.

I've never been so sorry to hear that someone is an actor, and believe me, I hate the theatre.

I suppose all that heroing business, that was tosh, too, right?

You don't get it. Every good thing I ever did was all me. I never faked a bit of that. Because I am a good person. Because I try to do the right thing.

What I faked was being happy. Was not being scared all the time. Was not hating having my powers so restricted that I couldn't defend myself. My Warden could have compromised and given me some of them back while I learned to control the rest. But instead he treated me like I was another Arthas. Even after his boyfriend kidnapped me, he still wouldn't do it. So I learned to swallow my anger and hide my fear, so that neither would make me a target.

I have made the best of a goddamn nightmare. If you judge me a liar because of that, and every good thing I have said and done fake, then you can go fuck yourself.

Flat | Top-Level Comments Only

four // video

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